I hate to tell you all this, my lovely and dulcet readers, but I am, on occasion, a hack and a fraud. OK, maybe I’m not a fraud, but at the moment, I am definitely playing the role of a hack. Why? Because I failed the entire blogging thing in every way yesterday. I wrote an entire entry about my feelings of expectation and the mini bits of anxiety that I always have before a trip. I talked about how it will be nice to see my plans come to fruition and how many times I’ve overcome these anxious feelings before. I wrote about a number of things for quite a while (I had some down time between meetings at work). And in the end, I managed to accidentally delete it all.
Further, I went to a local Event yesterday evening after work. People I enjoy were there, and we had a good time laughing, joking, telling stories, and just generally communing over frozen yogurt. And somehow, I managed to not take one single picture of it. The moment will be lost in time like … tears in the rain.
Here’s the thing: I talk about caching, and sometimes (though rarely), I talk about myself. But I never talk about my writing or my process. To paraphrase the Kaiser, who cares how the sausage is made? As long as I take it seriously and stick to the schedule I have set out, that’s all that really matters. I have in earlier days deviated from the schedule, occasionally by accident and at least once intentionally, but I take pride in the fact that when I say I’m going to post at 7:00 a.m. on a certain day, I post at 7:00 a.m. on the appropriate day. I know this isn’t going to be the harbinger of world unity or a treatise that schoolchildren will recite in ages to come, but it’s mine, and I take pride in it. Hopefully, you all receive some kind of joy from it, too.
However, I mucked it up yesterday. It happens. I’ll get up and go on and write more in the future, but I failed at it this time. So, this hack knocked this out so that you’d know that I’m sorry to stumble on you like this.
And before you try to console me, concerned that I’m making preparations for hara-kiri, don’t forget that I have an ego that could overwhelm a small vehicle. Today I’m a hack, but tomorrow I’ll be resplendent! Or some kind of crap like that…